Lately, I’ve been tired.
This year has brought some of the biggest changes of my life. Buying our first home. Taking on more responsibility professionally. Bigger expectations of myself, bigger goals for the future, and the financial reality that comes with building a life you once hoped for.
It's funny how sometimes getting what you prayed for introduces a completely new set of pressures.
I don't know how much weight I put into numerology but I read some time last year that 2026 would be a year of delayed gratification. That some of the things I wanted would take longer than I expected and a recent conversation brought me back to the moment I read that as it would have been a year ago now.
I remember thinking 'nah, I've worked too hard and been through too much, delays?? not happening!' hahah.
Some seasons of life ask you to keep showing up without immediate evidence that it’s working. To carry more before you receive more. To develop the discipline, patience and capacity required for the life you keep saying you want. I believe that because I've lived it.
I’m learning that gratitude and exhaustion can exist at the same time.
I can be incredibly grateful for my life and still admit that parts of this year have been hard. I can be proud of how far I’ve come while wanting more for myself. I can believe deeply in where I’m going without pretending the journey there always feels good.
I believe that delayed gratification isn’t about waiting for life to finally reward you.. It’s about becoming someone capable of carrying what you’re asking for when it arrives.
